Time

My granddaughter was out my window last night. She’s 12 and the fact she still comes over to see me fills me with joy. I know there will come a day soon when she’ll be too busy to hang out with me. I hope that never does happen but it’s the natural order of things.

When I have my grandkids, I always try to give them opportunities to talk about things that may be bothering them, questions they may have that they aren’t quite comfortable asking parents. Sometimes just to let them vent their frustrations. Everyone needs an outlet and I try to be theirs.

When I went on vacation with my daughter, her husband and their two girls, I told the girls if they needed private Grandma time, they only had to ask. I was asked by each girl several times a day! It gave each of them a chance to have special attention and they got to play whatever game they wanted without having to consider anyone else’s preferences. We’d play games, we’d read or tell each other stories, talk about anything they wanted to, talk about what happened that day and what the next day’s adventures would be.

That’s what last night was about. The girls have been coming over one at a time forever just to have that time with me. Since I live behind their house, they have easy access to me. I try to spend as much time with my grandsons as I can to give them that, also.

But what I’ve realized as my children have grown is that they’ve never outgrown their need to have that from me, either. What I’ve realized lately is that I’ve been neglecting to put fun into our time together. Yes, we’re silly and laugh like crazy over ridiculous things. Yes, we go do fun things. But where are the games? We don’t play together anymore.

My challenge to you today (and for myself) is to find ways to incorporate play into your relationships. There’s something about sitting down to a board game, cards or even a puzzle with people you love. My mom loved Yahtzee and we have special, dear memories of her playing with us. Dad liked word games more and he’d always play some obscure word that we would look up thinking he was cheating. Sometimes, he was!

Get the kids, grown kids and yourself away from the tv and phone/computer/tablet, etc. Sit down and play a hands on game. As my grandkids have discovered, it’s a lot of fun to be doing something together where you’re looking into each eyes, watching expressions, acting silly or serious…interacting. It’s important and it’s getting to be a lost art.

I have you have fun today.

Sunshine

The sun is out in full force today. It’s highlighting the frost everywhere and forcing me to see the beauty in it. I don’t want to see the beauty. I’m tired of the winter weather already and would have preferred a gloomy day to justify hibernation. Now my procrastination has to be addressed and I’ll have to drag myself out into that sunshiny world.

Sometimes I feel like that about my health. When my symptoms keep me at home, it’s almost a relief. An excuse not to leave the comfort of my home. An excuse not to talk to anyone. An excuse not to put myself out in any way.

I know that’s not a mentally healthy way to feel. Luckily, I don’t feel that way as often as I have in the past, but I also don’t always recognize my procrastination for leaving the house for what it really is. Depression.

Sneaky thing, that is. When gloomy, grey weather becomes your best friend, you have a problem. I normally rejoice in the sunshine so when I didn’t this morning, I realized I must be feeling gloomy in my soul.

Why is this? There’s no reason for it. At the moment, my pain level is at a normal spot, I’m not nauseous today, my bills are paid, I have everything I need/want. But that’s the thing with sneaky depression-there doesn’t always have to be a reason.

Now that’s I’ve caught this sneaking up on me, though, I will meet it head on. It will not get the best of me. I’m going out in the cold sunshine and I will rejoice being alive to do so. I will talk to anyone I meet and smile at everyone. And enjoy doing so. When I can take myself out of myself, my spirits lift effortlessly.

If I had waited till later today to write this blog, I would be writing how wonderful the sunshine is, how beautiful the frost, how bracing the cold, how productive my day is. Because that’s exactly how I will feel in a little while. But if I don’t write about the darker side of my life, no one will ever know it. Everyone has a side they hide from the world. I’m lucky enough to have had a life that has had nonstop ups and downs. I say lucky because I’ve learned the skills needed to stay positive through it all. Or so I thought till I fell into such a dark hole I couldn’t climb out by myself. There’s no shame in that or in the way I’m feeling this morning. But you must take action to get out of that mindset or you’ll fall. I won’t go into that pit again without a fight and my fight this morning is walking out my door.

So, I’m doing it.

My challenge to you today is to do the same. Do the opposite of what feels right to you. If hibernating is all you want to do, then get out into the world for a few minutes even. Suddenly, your perspective will change. For the better. So, enjoy your day!

Happiness

As I’m looking at all the packages wrapped and under my tree, (Type A, seriously!) I enjoy thinking of all the happiness they’ll bring to the receiver. How I wish I could box up other kinds of happiness to give my loved ones. Freedom from financial worries, joy for every day, love and fulfillment. 

That’s just a dream, of course. But my challenge to you today is to find a way to help your loved ones through tough times. My way is to buy them things for Christmas that they can’t afford or won’t buy for themselves. To babysit without being asked. To do dishes or clean. To send notes of love and encouragement. Surprise someone with a nice meal. 

These aren’t big things in themselves but they add up to a lot to the person on the receiving end. Just to know that someone cares enough to see even small needs means the world to someone in turmoil or just overwhelmed. 

If that’s you today, then I hope my words give you the love and encouragement you need. Turn from your own needs and see what you can do for someone else. You’ll soon begin to feel better about your own situation.

Wishing you a wonderful day!

Chaos

That word, chaos, describes how my mind and life have felt the past few weeks. I stopped writing in my blog when I became frustrated with my laptop for hiding all my downloaded photos! Normally, this would not be a big deal but for some reason, I just became overwhelmed and threw up my hands.

My loved ones have noticed my lack of posts and tell me they miss them. That calmed some of the stress and so, I’m back. I’ve also discovered where my photos are being hidden. When computers think they’re smarter than the user… For some reason, the photos were being added to previous folders all the way back to 2014!!! I’d never thought of searching through every single folder in order to find newly downloaded pictures. My goodness. Live and learn.

That’s my challenge to you today. To live and learn. I’m not one to give up easily so obviously, I’d reached the end of my rope when I stopped writing. When you reach that point, talk to your loved ones and suddenly, you’ll find new strength and energy. When you’re overwhelmed, you tend to shut yourself off from people. You should be doing the opposite.

Then take a deep breath and find a new perspective to deal with your challenges. If I can do it, then you can, too. Of course, some days, it’s an ongoing process but that’s ok. I’m alive and I’m learning from all mistakes or failures I have. It may not prevent further ones but it will help me deal with them.

I wish you a wonderful day full of love and hope.

Flames

 

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As my son-in-law was burning wood we didn’t need last night, I went outside to watch the flames. As I stared into them, I thought of all the people in CA and what they’ve lost. The flames were flaring up and very beautiful and I said I felt guilty appreciating the beauty in them when they cause so much destruction and break so many hearts.

There is beauty and fascination watching destructive forces at work. If you’ve never seen or felt the power of a tornado, hurricane, fire or flood (yes, I’m one of THOSE! I stood in my backdoor taking photos as a tornado came close enough to twist my garage door right in front of my eyes.) then you’ll know what I mean. The action, the unpredictability, the excitement of it… Part of the draw is the danger.

Why are people so attracted to danger? Makes me wonder sometimes. Halloween, people flock to haunted houses hoping to feel the thrill of a scare. Roller coasters, climbing mountains, etc are all things that raise the adrenaline and some people are just drawn to that.

I’ve always thought of myself as a major coward because I’m not drawn to those things. And yet, a powerful storm or watching a fire (a controlled fire!) fills me with appreciation for those things. The wonder of lightening streaking across the sky never fails to thrill.

Today, I challenge you to look at what might be a destructive attraction to some danger in your life. The beauty in a man who doesn’t treat you well can blind you to that fact. A child who manipulates you with their cuteness when you know you should be setting firm rules for the child’s own good. These are just a few examples of things that could be harming you while you’re caught up in mesmerizing flames. Drag your eyes away from that and look past that to the truth hiding within.

Wishing you a wonderful day!

New Day

Opened my blinds a few minutes ago and I’m struck once again with how lucky I am. I could see my daughter sitting down to a cup of coffee and my granddaughters running around getting ready for school. It’s a sight I never take for granted and am constantly thankful for.

The only view that would improve that would be if my other daughters and grandkids lived within my sight, also. My favorite view is seeing those faces as often as possible.

My challenge to you today is to be grateful for those you love and who love you in return. Be mindful of that love and don’t take it for granted. Celebrate it and remember loves who may have passed on or just out of your life. Love lives on forever and knowing my parents were just as happy to catch sight of my children and I makes my heart feel warm.

With the weather dipping below freezing, it’s wonderful to feel warm inside. I wish you that comforting feeling today. Enjoy your day!

Short hospital stay

Waking up in the morning with a pain level of over 9 is not a fun way to begin a day. Having the pain climb to over 10 (which means I cry nonstop-no control over that at this point) and then having to wait on the ambulance to finish 2 other runs before they could get to me… Well, lets’ just say that Fri is better forgotten.

Forgetting Sat is also a good idea, too. The pain was under control by then but the nausea was not.

Woke this morning and knew the crisis was past and that I’d be able to come back home. But, just because I’m home doesn’t mean my day has suddenly turned out ok. I’m exhausted but can’t sleep. Try to read and my eyes cross. Forget sewing. Taking a walk? Not quite up to that.

I had plans with one of my daughters for today. We were heading to OH for the night. Planned on going to an art museum and several antique malls. In the morning, we were going to a book sale. Disappointed not to be able to do those things with her. I treasure out times together.

It’s actually a good thing that my body is not feeling well because I’d be very tempted to just go anyway. I have trouble cancelling things that are important to me and my family. I hate to disappoint anyone. But, if I tried to do what we’d planned, there is a good chance I would just feel worse. Not that I would even be able to drive down the driveway yet today! There are just times I need to accept the answer is “no”. Once I accept that, I can move on.

I think I’ll move on to bed for awhile! If I can get a short nap in, maybe I can read when I get up. That would make my day so much better.

I wish you all a nice day and that you can challenge yourself to accept when “no” is the answer. It’s sometimes a hard word but it’s usually for our own good. Find the joy in the change of plans you’ve made and you’ll find that that curve you hadn’t expected to take may lead you to even greater happiness that you ever dreamed of.